THE CABINET MINISTER, THE BEAUTY, CREWE BY-ELECTION …and CILLA BLACK!

My story on Tory Turncoat millionairre – and Labour SECRETARY OF STATE FOR NORTHERN iRELAND – the creepy deeply oily SHAUN WOODWARD – has evoked a response from both aides to GEMMA GARRETT( she has aides!) and Woodward himself!  Woodward – anxious to deny he was schmoosing a rival candidate as leader Gordo is involved in a poltical life  or deathstruggle – gets an aide to contact me by way of explanation.  HE WAS IN FACT DINING WITH CILLA BLACK – and GEMMA WAS ON THE NEXT TABLE. You fucking what – what’s the leacherous toad doing with the widow CILLA BLACK?? And then a message from ‘an aide to Gemma Garrett!  Here’s the twosome explaining away their chance meeting:

“Gemma was there in The Ivy with the chairman of Miss Great Britain, and Shaun was having dinner with Cilla Black, and they just got chatting,” explains an aide to Garrett.

“He was extremely nice and told her if she needed any help up there, or if anyone was giving her any problems, she should call him. She hasn’t rung yet, but she kept his number.”

Woodward’s assistant calls to explain: really, Garrett is such a keen political animal that, as she scanned the restaurant’s celebrity clientele, she recognised Woodward and insisted on meeting him: “Shaun was having dinner with a friend at a separate table.

You what – NOT EVEN GORDON BROWN RECOGNISES SHAUN WOODWARD ON SIGHT!!

So the bounder – after being recognised by Miss Great Britain ( as he habitually is no doubt) – It was MISS CLEETHORPES last week – drops DAME CILLA BLACK and hotfoots it to the lovely Gemma stuffing his phone number into her hand saying ( his own aides words) ….‘IF ANYONES GIVING YOU PROBLEMS GIVE ME A RING’. What’s he gonna do? Send Johnny Adair round to put the frighteners on TAMSIN DUNWOODY?? A llamas’ head in EDWARD TIMPSON’S bed?

Meanwhile back in Crewe Labour’s losing a by-election – a lorra laughs Shaun!

Leave a comment

Filed under Uncategorized

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s