Hilarious: Government to bring in new measures to stop anarchists targetting royal wedding and arrest ringleaders – of an event that only exists in Bob Broadhurst’s fervid brain!! Statement in parliament 3.30pm. We are also promised a ‘Royal wedding ring of steel’ – Blimey you thought William could have afforded silver at least!
Well according to Uncle Bob Broadhurst of the Met we are. After presiding over yet another policing fiasco – ‘anarchist mobs allowed to roam free on orgy of destruction’ – Bob has admited ‘we partly failed’. He admits that the Black Bloc’s mobility outhought the cops and that it ‘was very difficult to stop people who dont mind smashing things up in full view of the press’. So he’s now desperately trying to talk up Royal wedding protests so he can win the rematch – and avoid the sack. So he’s threatening the use of stop and search powers and hinting yet more draconian public order legislation is needed. Bob desperately wants a re-match. Pugilists will recall that the champ never offers the defeated a re-match. I fear tis the sack for Uncle Bob. In the meantime the absence of any such plans won’t halt the Royal wedding riot stories…….’Daily Mail’ today has ‘anarchists plan to inflitrate royal pageant’ – presumably dressed up as postillions and Lords of the Bedchamber! Remember searching the old french phrase book ‘ Ow you say – zee postillion has been struck by lightning?’
Like most folks I know we’ll be heading to the central London street party organised by REPUBLIC for cucumber sandwiches and Pymms while old Uncle Bob Broadhurst harrumphs around looking for a punch-up.