Firstly – Stewart is not standing nor is there anyone who has asked him to stand. But Stewart – some have greatness thrust upon them. I’ve been racking my brains for a sparky character who might enliven the dread boredom of  Boris/Ken and Paddick re-run. Someone with a bit of politics and humour outside the far left ghetto who can give as good as he gets and might have wide appeal. Perhapss someone who was a member of the Humannist asociation and the National Secular society. I won’t go on – you know the kinda person. STEWART LEE. Draft stewart Lee. If you know Stewart go and wake him up. If  you see a performance – ask him if he’s standing. To your Facebooks and Twitters comrades. It shall come to pass.

STOP PRESS: Oh fuck me – I should have checked his wikipedia page before allowing a heady rush to consume me. I am indeed indebted to comrade SHARPE   for pointing out to me that Stewart Lee went to fucking Oxford. Can you adam ane eve it – this campaign is now abandoned having lasted for 11 minutes. …is this a record…………but wait…here’s a suggestion from ANON:

‘How about Derren Brown… From Croydon, not Oxbridge (did go to private school but only because his Dad was a teacher there…)

He’s very secular and quite anti-religion…. And he can bamboozle people into voting for him with his Jedi mind tricks’

Yes brilliant Derren Brown could swizzle the results………….bamboozle the opposition into thinking they’d lost….confuse the vote counters….get Boris to admit defeat before the count starts……endless possibilities…..he wouldnt havr to run a campaign just turn up to the count and cause mayhem!


Filed under Uncategorized


  1. Sharpe

    Bone in ‘Vote for private school & Oxford graduate candidate’ shock

  2. FitWatcher

    Whore-Gun-How? (his very name, a striking instance of nominative determinism, encapsulates much of his brief) makes it clear this Monday evening that he intends, irrespective of ‘Mayor,’ to lord it over London’s streets. A rare opportunity to express the responsible response to his totalitarian concept of Total Policing. (In coming months watch out, for example, for more of his Berlin-style mobile walls of steel.) All are welcome:

  3. Jamesie Aaron Cotter

    Yeah but no but Stewart was adopted before his childhood in middle class Solihull and private school and Oxford. So why not adopt him as a candidate and restore him to his natural alienation?
    Who else has consistently interviewed Alan Moore and really pushed the envelope on TV? So sayeth the son of an Oxbridge dad who abandoned his three children early on.

  4. Northern A

    I went to Oxford, was expensive and I won’t be going back. Was a nice day out though.

  5. Anonymous

    How about Derren Brown… From Croydon, not Oxbridge (did go to private school but only because his Dad was a teacher there…)

    He’s very secular and quite anti-religion…. And he can bamboozle people into voting for him with his Jedi mind tricks….

  6. Turpin

    he went to solihull boys private school, who we mashed 5-1 in 1981.
    Stuart was always a nice guy. nowt ponsy about him


    Eric Cantona, the self-confessed ‘anarchist’? But mebbe he’ll be too busy standing for the French Presidency, like a seagull following a trawler…

  8. Northern A

    Ricky Thomlinson!!!!

  9. Northern A

    Or would he need a southern passport to stand in London? Fuck me it’s a complicated spot down there.

  10. Let Him Stand!!!!

    AAAaahhhhh, gowon, gowon, gowon… let Stewpot have a pop. AAaaaahhhhh, go-wwwwwwwon, go-wwwwon, gowwww-on… the final me&myBullingdonMates sketch from his last series about an (untrue) episode when he booked a band for a Cameron event was an insider-outsider piece of fucking brilliance! The ENTIRE petite-boooshwahh mindset in 2 minutes….
    Ohhhhh, gow-on, go-won, gowwwwww-wwwwon, you KNOW he would get more airtime than a baby panda kissing a kitten.
    AAAaaaaaooohhhhh, go-won, go-won, go-won… let Stewart Lee have your approval. Please. Go on. Make it happen.

    (And it’s about time Mark Thomas got a run for his money.)

    (Though Mr Thomas is okay, given the state of the world, too.)

  11. all men are equal unless they went to wrong uni

    I couldn’t give a fuck where Stewart Lee was educated. It doesn’t change the fact he’s the most astute comedian out there. Does the choice of where you went to uni (when you were still basically a kid) stop you from being someone who is genuine? Half the people that currently call themselves anarchists probably went to Oxbridge anyway. Put it this way, I could count on one hand the amount of working class born and bred anarchists I’ve ever met in my life. Which kind of says it all really.

  12. all men are equal unless they went to wrong uni

    Anyway, Stewart Lee would never do something like you suggest here. Derren Brown on the other hand would definitely do it if he thought there was a TV show to be made out of it and he could show off.

  13. all men are equal unless they went to wrong uni

    So there we have it… Oxbridge Stewart Lee, a staunch anti establishment comedian. And decent middle class boy from Croydon, Derren Brown who performs to order for any politician that asks and is more establishment than Paul Daniels. Oh the irony.

    • Spotted Dick from 'ackney Wick

      According to the Sutton Trust analysis carried out last year –

      Out of 2,468 schools and six form colleges in England and Wales, overall around two thirds of all pupils went on to be accepted at any type university (including the former ‘Polytechnic of Public Toilets’ etc); but only 24% overall were accepted by one of the top 30 (i.e real) universities (let alone just by Oxbridge which was such a minute percentage you almost cannot measure it).

      However, out of the 600 or so public, private and grammar school’s pupils 79% went onto attend a university, and for 48% this meant a real one (in reality this was probably means over half of all fee-paying and selective pupils got into one of the elite top 30 universities).

      Out of 14,000 or so comprehensives and secondary moderns, only 17% of their pupils went on to attend any one of the top 30 universities (in actual fact, due to nil returns from a large number of state schools, these percentages are almost certainly much lower).

      So well over 80% (at least) of us ‘working class born and bred anarchists’ never attended university at all or else attended a ‘university’ which was formerly a bus garage, a mechanics institute, or a borstal.

      But I fully accept that I therefore need my new Mayor of London to have been selected from a microscopic elite of (not only) former privately educated Oxbridge pupils, but in the examples cited above (Mark Thomas, Stewart Lee, Derren Brown, Eric Cantona etc) millionaires (except Ricky Tomlinson, but he was an NF organiser in the 1960s so he can ‘my arrse-off too)


    They’re breeding anarchists now?! Well I never, whatever next!

  15. Can’t we enter a pig , like in that movie ‘Babe’ ? might not win (!) but would give everyone a laugh.

  16. Delenda France

    In October 2010 Cantona gave a radical interview : calling for a revolution and asking people to take back all they moneys from the banks to accelerate the banks collapsing.

  17. alan on tyneside

    Stuff comedians and TV personalities. Either Patrick or Martin. Everyone who agrees wave their hands vigourously.

    Fuck! What am I saying? I don’t even believe in this bourgeouse democaracy voting shite.

  18. harry

    The thing about Stewart Lee is that he went to Oxford but is exceptional

    The thing about Ed Milliband and George Osborne is that they were at Oxford at the same time as Stewart Lee but were both mediocre nomarks who would not have got anywhere in life but for their connections.

  19. lou

    How about Charlie Brooker?

    Cynical blokes, popular, likes to swear on telly… not near a private school…

  20. Stewart Lee is like Harry said exceptional. Adopted in his first year of life, therefore probably little of the love and attention most children have in their first year. Passed his 11 plus, letting him go to Grammar school. From a Grammar getting to Oxford, not that common believe me. He is a visionary and despite not having been loved or being religious carries more love and respect for people than most. When I watch him I see the anger and vitriol inside only those discarded by their real parents feel. I know I was adopted and went to University myself not Oxford and from a Comprehensive and not a Grammar, but like Lee I realize deep down my fate could have been institutionalized care. Judge him for what he is, more self created than most people.

  21. Someone mentioned Ricky Thomlinson was in the NF in the 60s. To be fair to him, it was for a couple of years towards the end of the decade after he’d been moved by Enoch Powell’s speech. He soon changed his mind and was a full on lefty by 1972…. followed by MI5 and everything.

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